Grandboy, interrupting me during prayers: What? God’s YOUR dad? He makes stars and fish and stuff. <\/p>\n
Me: Well I have a dad here on Earth and a dad who is in heaven\u200b – God. And you do too. <\/p>\n
Grandboy (makes a face): My dad is bad. He breaks the law. I don’t like him. <\/p>\n
Me (gently): Listen. Yes. He did do that. But God still loves him anyway. I pray your dad gets better and learns to do good things. <\/p>\n
Grandboy: God loves him even if he’s bad? <\/p>\n
Me: Yes. He might not like what he does, but he still loves him. Just like I may not always like what you do, but I always love you. <\/p>\n
Grandboy (folds hands): God, please help my dad be good so he can do good things like me. Okay, God? You can do it. Amen. <\/p>\n
— We could all use a prayer warrior like that in our corner \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Grandboy, interrupting me during prayers: What? God’s YOUR dad? He makes stars and fish and stuff. Me: Well I…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-919","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-eP","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":804,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/08\/25\/gwumpa-joke-dad-joke-every-time\/","url_meta":{"origin":919,"position":0},"title":"Gwumpa joke > Dad joke, every time","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 25, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: Hey you know why this (points to a picture) is called a dinosaur? Grandboy: Why Gwumpa? Me: 'Cuz they're dead. See? DIEnosaur. Grandboy: Yah! They DIEnosaurs Me: And if they were still alive they'd be LIVEasaurs Grandboy: NO STAAAP","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1140,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/06\/12\/supermad\/","url_meta":{"origin":919,"position":1},"title":"Supermad","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"June 12, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: I'm Superman. Me: You're Soup and Ham? Grandboy: No. I said I'm SUPERman Me: You're Snoopy Dad? Grandboy: AAAUGH NOW I'M SUPER MAD Me: I thought you said you were Grandboy: GWUUUUMMMMPPPAAAAAAHHHHH","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1456,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/09\/06\/a-little-treet\/","url_meta":{"origin":919,"position":2},"title":"A little TREEt","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"September 6, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (as we're cutting down trees on Minecraft): Grandpa, tell me a Dad Joke Me: I WOOD if I knew any Grandboy: Ha that's a good one! Me (waving my axe in the air): But first I have to AXE this tree a question Grandboy: Aaugh grandpa Me (collecting the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1153,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/08\/17\/toughening-of-the-skin\/","url_meta":{"origin":919,"position":3},"title":"Toughening of the skin","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 17, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: ...and her dad, he got stung by a WHOLE LOTTA yellow jackets and died. I don't know if she said he was allergic but it was A LOT. Me: O no. I'm sorry he died. Grandboy: Yah, and.. hey, wait. Do you REALLY MEAN that or are you like,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":790,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/06\/21\/only-the-shadow-knows\/","url_meta":{"origin":919,"position":4},"title":"Only the Shadow knows…","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"June 21, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Mamasan (on speakerphone): Dad, what do you think I used for this site's user ID and password? Me (chuckling): I don't know what you would have used... maybe try [email address]? Grandboy (piping up): GWUMPA wat you mean you don't know? You know EVERYTHING. Me (laughing) I don't know EVERYTHING,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1398,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/08\/31\/take-my-hand-please\/","url_meta":{"origin":919,"position":5},"title":"Take my hand, please","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 31, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Lady on video game: If you'll take my hand, your majesty, we'll make our way there. Me: But if he takes her hand, she'll have only one left. Grandboy (puzzled): Huh? (gets the dad joke) Ah grandpa that's just something people say when they mean, \"Come hold my hand\". 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