Me: [cleaning]<\/p>\n
Grandboy: Gwumpa i’m driving my car to your shop. You can fix it for me?<\/p>\n
Me: I can’t sorry, I’m cleaning things right now.<\/p>\n
Grandboy: it’s PRETEND<\/p>\n
Me: [looking over at pretend car] Sorry, I can’t play pretend. i need to get this stuff cleaned up before the working man comes here.<\/p>\n
Grandboy: No gwumpa, PRETEND you’re playing with me.<\/p>\n
Me: Ummmm, ok. I’m PRETENDING to play with you while i clean up the house.<\/p>\n
Grandboy: Yay! That’s good gwumpa, good job<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Me: [cleaning] Grandboy: Gwumpa i’m driving my car to your shop. You can fix it for me? Me: I…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-869","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-e1","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":720,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2015\/12\/20\/the-magic-of-pretending\/","url_meta":{"origin":869,"position":0},"title":"The magic of pretending","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"December 20, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Why the Christmas lights outside shut off in the daytime? Me: O that's because of the photoelectric cells. They see the sun is up and flip the switch to cut off the flow of electricity to the lights. Grandboy: Oooooh. And when it's darktime the phonolen thing it turns\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":850,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/11\/26\/look-its-flip-wilson\/","url_meta":{"origin":869,"position":1},"title":"Look, it’s Flip Wilson","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"November 26, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (with silent stealthy moves, deftly and powerfully leaps onto the sleeping form of his gwumpa in the morning): ... Me (with equally stealthy moves, deftly and powerfully flips the oncoming bundle of unknown off onto the floor): ... Grandboy stops pretending to be a ninja so he can pretend\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1259,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/07\/15\/pretend-your-life-depends-on-it\/","url_meta":{"origin":869,"position":2},"title":"Pretend your life depends on it","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"July 15, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy and I were playing the \"Pretend Your Life Depends On It\" game this weekend... Grandboy (weakly stretching forward): Grandpa. I can't reach that toy car. Can you get it for me? Me: Nope, you get it. Pretend your life depends on it and you're by yourself. ... Grandboy (straining):\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1000,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/10\/01\/know-thine-enemy\/","url_meta":{"origin":869,"position":3},"title":"Know thine enemy","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"October 1, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Too quiet in here. I can't eat. Me: Quiet is good. You can hear your enemies come when it's quiet. Grandboy: (through muffled bites of pancake): Who's our enemy, gwumpa? Me: Zombies. And people who would hurt us. (Opens the blinds) But looks like no zombies today. Grandboy: Zombies\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":743,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/05\/29\/good-vs-ebil\/","url_meta":{"origin":869,"position":4},"title":"Good vs Ebil","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 29, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (shaking the bars of a gate): Hey Gwumpa let's pretend we're the bad guys and have to break our way out... Me: How bout this? Let's pretend we're the good guys and the bad guys trapped us in a cage. They are making us dependent on their federal aid.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":854,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/12\/09\/sharknados-with-red-noses\/","url_meta":{"origin":869,"position":5},"title":"Sharknados with red noses","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"December 9, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: ...so what about Sharknados? Grandboy: GWUMPA you making me think about stuff that's NOT REAL! Me: O like Santa Claus? Grandboy: You ruining it for me Gwumpa. I know he's not real but I pretend he's real. Not like sharknados. 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