Grandson: Hey look gwumpa I made an Ender Portal (jumps inside)<\/p>\n
Me: …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Grandson: Hey look gwumpa I made an Ender Portal (jumps inside) Me: …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-860","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-dS","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":120,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2013\/11\/24\/rebel-with-a-clue\/","url_meta":{"origin":860,"position":0},"title":"Rebel with a clue","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"November 24, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandson found a new way to defy authority. He's scattered my 8 pieces of bubblewrap film (each about 8 feet long) around the house in what appears to be strategic places. Then when he does something he's not supposed to, and me or his momma go over to stop him,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":423,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2015\/05\/09\/spiderboy\/","url_meta":{"origin":860,"position":1},"title":"Spiderboy","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 9, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"A breathless grandboy came running up to me, wiping his face. \"GWUMPA gwumpa hey gwumpa look hey gwumpa gwumpa AAGH hey\" \"Hm. What's the problem?\" \"Gwumpa i ran into spider web. Spider web on my face. \u00a0Look see see look spider web on my face! \u00a0Spider web.\" [looking] \"I don't\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":126,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2013\/03\/23\/what-did-you-say\/","url_meta":{"origin":860,"position":2},"title":"What did you say?","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"March 23, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"I learned that when the grandson says 'choochoocar' he means, 'train engine' but when he says 'peepeecar' he means 'crayon\" Language is a funny thing","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1422,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/01\/11\/the-best-grandpa-ever\/","url_meta":{"origin":860,"position":3},"title":"The best grandpa EVER","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 11, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: \"...boss baby.\" Me: Would you like to be a boss baby? Grandboy: No. Me: Why not? Grandboy: Why do you always ask me things? AAUGH that's like me asking me your deepest darkest secret. Me: Ok. Grandboy: So... What IS your deepest darkest secret? Me: That I have a\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1045,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/12\/24\/the-best-medicine\/","url_meta":{"origin":860,"position":4},"title":"The best medicine","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"December 24, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Ha hey gwumpa wasn't it funny when I threw up out of my nose just now? (He's been battling a cold for a while now) Me: Um yep, that was funny (smile) Grandboy: Sometimes you just have to laugh at yourself, huh Gwumpa? Me: Yep sometimes that's all you\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1248,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/06\/11\/ears-to-you-ol-chum\/","url_meta":{"origin":860,"position":5},"title":"Ears to you, ol’ chum","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"June 11, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (disembodied voice): HEY GRANDPA you can't find me Me (resisting the temptation to say, \"because I'm not looking\"): Are you under the table? Grandboy (giggling): No Me: Are you... (we go through a series of places where he's not) Grandboy: C'mon, grandpa, you have to actually GUESS. Me: Are\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/860","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=860"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/860\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":861,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/860\/revisions\/861"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=860"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=860"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=860"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}