Grandboy (quietly giggling and whispering is his raspy voice): hey gwumpa you can’t find me<\/p>\n
gwumpa over here can’t find me (giggle)<\/p>\n
hey look for me<\/p>\n
Me: I can’t find you ‘cuz I ain’t lookin’ for ya.<\/p>\n
Grandboy (stands up): GWUMPA<\/p>\n
Hehe gotta know how to flush them out of the bushes<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Grandboy (quietly giggling and whispering is his raspy voice): hey gwumpa you can’t find me gwumpa over here can’t…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-798","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-cS","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1089,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/05\/19\/its-nighttime\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":0},"title":"It’s NIGHTTIME","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 19, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Hey Gwumpa whatcha doin'? Me: Resting my head in the table. Grandboy: Why? Me: I'm just a little tired, that's all Grandboy (sounding like his mamasan): GWUMPA you need to REST. Your body needs REST. Go back to bed. Me: ... Grandboy: Hey Gwumpa, I can't believe I'm saying\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1065,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/03\/06\/gwumpa-is-always-shouting\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":1},"title":"Gwumpa is always shouting","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"March 6, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: O hey please stop touching the walls. I just had them painted. Grandboy: Ok Gwumpa. Me: Ok stop touching the walls. Your hands are greasy and I'm trying to keep the new paint clean. Grandboy: Ok Gwumpa, sorry. Me: No, really, STOP TOUCHING THE WALLS when you walk past\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":913,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/02\/17\/refrigerator-is-cool\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":2},"title":"Refrigerator is cool","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"February 17, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: Hey come on in and see something cool Grandboy: Is it a new GAME? Me: Nope Grandboy: Is it a new PUPPY? Me: Nope Grandboy: I know it's a BASEBALL BAT! Me: Nope Grandboy (exasperated): Auuugh gwumpa what is it?!? Me: It's a new refrigerator Grandboy: That's not cool...\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/IMG_20170205_155621.jpg?fit=845%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/IMG_20170205_155621.jpg?fit=845%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/IMG_20170205_155621.jpg?fit=845%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/IMG_20170205_155621.jpg?fit=845%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":804,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/08\/25\/gwumpa-joke-dad-joke-every-time\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":3},"title":"Gwumpa joke > Dad joke, every time","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 25, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: Hey you know why this (points to a picture) is called a dinosaur? Grandboy: Why Gwumpa? Me: 'Cuz they're dead. See? DIEnosaur. Grandboy: Yah! They DIEnosaurs Me: And if they were still alive they'd be LIVEasaurs Grandboy: NO STAAAP","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":911,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/02\/18\/cool-like-gwumpa\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":4},"title":"Cool like Gwumpa","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"February 18, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Hey gwumpa I see you changed your gamertag picture. Show me how to change mine please. Me: Sure (shows him how) Grandboy: Oh WOW! THESE ARE COOL PICTURES TO CHOOSE FROM Me: Yep, pic any one you want Grandboy: So, why you not choose a cool one for yours?\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":996,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/09\/30\/hello-is-it-me-youre-looking-for\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":5},"title":"HELLO! IS IT ME YOU’RE LOOKING FOR…?","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"September 30, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (making a sustained screeching sound) Me: OI HEY OI STOP THAT Grandboy: I can't help it Gwumpa Me: How 'bout, instead of screaming, you sing something. I'd like that better. So would everyone else. Grandboy: Ok Gwumpa (later) Grandboy (singing, screechily) HELLO! IS IT ME YOU'RE LOOKING FOR...? ----\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=798"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":799,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798\/revisions\/799"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=798"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=798"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=798"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}