Grandboy: Why the Christmas lights outside shut off in the daytime?<\/p>\n
Me: O that’s because of the photoelectric cells. They see the sun is up and flip the switch to cut off the flow of electricity to the lights.<\/p>\n
Grandboy: Oooooh. And when it’s darktime the phonolen thing it turns on the lights.<\/p>\n
Me: Yep.<\/p>\n
Grandboy: But I can PRETEND they turn on and off with MAGIC, right?<\/p>\n
Me: Sure! Nothing wrong with pretending about magic. Boom you’re a monkey.<\/p>\n
Grandboy: Now I’m hungry Gwumpa. I can have banana now?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Grandboy: Why the Christmas lights outside shut off in the daytime? Me: O that’s because of the photoelectric cells.…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-720","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-bC","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":869,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/01\/21\/pretending-to-play\/","url_meta":{"origin":720,"position":0},"title":"Pretending to play","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 21, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: [cleaning] Grandboy: Gwumpa i'm driving my car to your shop. You can fix it for me? Me: I can't sorry, I'm cleaning things right now. Grandboy: it's PRETEND Me: [looking over at pretend car] Sorry, I can't play pretend. i need to get this stuff cleaned up before the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":887,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/11\/18\/bringin-home-the-bacon-woman\/","url_meta":{"origin":720,"position":1},"title":"Bringin’ home the bacon, woman","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"November 18, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (pretending to carry a briefcase): Bye mom, I'm going to work now. Mamasan: Bye! Bring home the bacon. Grandboy (confused): No mom, I'm not going to the STORE. I'm going to WORK. Mamasan: O that's what you say when someone goes to work. \"Bring home the bacon\". Grandboy: OOH\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":850,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2016\/11\/26\/look-its-flip-wilson\/","url_meta":{"origin":720,"position":2},"title":"Look, it’s Flip Wilson","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"November 26, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (with silent stealthy moves, deftly and powerfully leaps onto the sleeping form of his gwumpa in the morning): ... Me (with equally stealthy moves, deftly and powerfully flips the oncoming bundle of unknown off onto the floor): ... Grandboy stops pretending to be a ninja so he can pretend\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1462,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/09\/26\/irish-wristwatch\/","url_meta":{"origin":720,"position":3},"title":"Irish wristwatch","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"September 26, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: Say the word \"wristwatch\" Grandboy: Wristwatch. Me: Ok, say it a couple of times again Grandboy (repeats it) Me: Ok. Now say the word, \"Irish\" Grandboy: Irish. Me: Ok, say it a couple of times again Grandboy (repeats it) Me: Good. Grandboy: Why did you want me to say\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1422,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/01\/11\/the-best-grandpa-ever\/","url_meta":{"origin":720,"position":4},"title":"The best grandpa EVER","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 11, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: \"...boss baby.\" Me: Would you like to be a boss baby? Grandboy: No. Me: Why not? Grandboy: Why do you always ask me things? AAUGH that's like me asking me your deepest darkest secret. Me: Ok. Grandboy: So... What IS your deepest darkest secret? Me: That I have a\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1497,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2021\/01\/02\/annoying-parrot\/","url_meta":{"origin":720,"position":5},"title":"Annoying Parrot","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 2, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: BWAAAP BWAAAP BWAAAP BWAAAP Me: What are you doing? Grandboy: BWAAAP BWAAAP BWAAAP BWAAAP Me (stares in Texan): ... Grandboy: I'm being an annoying parrot Me: You're doing a surprisingly good job. Grandboy: You're doing a surprisingly good job. Me: Huh? Grandboy: Huh? Me (catching on): I said nothing.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/720","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=720"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/720\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":721,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/720\/revisions\/721"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=720"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=720"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=720"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}