Teaching the littleun about yardwork and coffee breaks. And spiders.<\/p>\n
“Spidurrrr!!” cries he.<\/p>\n
“Spider? Oh yah, that’s a spider.”<\/p>\n
“Spidurrrr!!”, he repeats, still unsure of the situation.<\/p>\n
“It’s ok. It won’t get you.”<\/p>\n
“Won’t get youuuu?”<\/p>\n
“No, unless it’s a jumpy spider.”<\/p>\n
“Ohhhhh”<\/p>\n
“Let’s see… what kind IS it? Hmmm.” [we get closer]<\/p>\n
[me]\u00a0“A JUMPY SPIDER!!! AHHHH”<\/p>\n
[he] “Ahhhhhh!!!!1!!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Teaching the littleun about yardwork and coffee breaks. And spiders. “Spidurrrr!!” cries he. “Spider? Oh yah, that’s a spider.”…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-333","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-5n","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":423,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2015\/05\/09\/spiderboy\/","url_meta":{"origin":333,"position":0},"title":"Spiderboy","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 9, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"A breathless grandboy came running up to me, wiping his face. \"GWUMPA gwumpa hey gwumpa look hey gwumpa gwumpa AAGH hey\" \"Hm. What's the problem?\" \"Gwumpa i ran into spider web. Spider web on my face. \u00a0Look see see look spider web on my face! \u00a0Spider web.\" [looking] \"I don't\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/2814755278_bba0d32ebb_o1.jpg?fit=800%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":174,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2013\/11\/23\/jump-pop-pop-jump-pop\/","url_meta":{"origin":333,"position":1},"title":"Jump pop pop jump pop","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"November 23, 2013","format":"image","excerpt":"Hard to tell in this pic, but thanks to a mail-order purchase we have about 8 feet of medium-size bubble wrap. Add a jumpy boy and it's lots of noisy fun","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/1424555_10151720484976249_1077473741_n1.jpg?fit=600%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/1424555_10151720484976249_1077473741_n1.jpg?fit=600%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/1424555_10151720484976249_1077473741_n1.jpg?fit=600%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":302,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2014\/02\/11\/excercising-our-rights\/","url_meta":{"origin":333,"position":2},"title":"Excercising our rights","author":"admin","date":"February 11, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Tues night exercise class: 1. Climb on the couch, with grandkid in lap 2. Start up \"Assassin's Creed II\" 3. Have Ezio Auditore da Firenze climb to a very very very high point 4. Find the jumpy spot on the high point and, naturally, make Ezio jump 5. Shout EEEEAAAAAGLLLLE\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":972,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/08\/26\/gwumpa-oatmeal\/","url_meta":{"origin":333,"position":3},"title":"Gwumpa oatmeal","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 26, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Thought I'd share this one. It's a fav around here. 1\/2 cup oatmeal. \u00a0Don't need the fancy stuff but if you have it, ok sure. 1\/4 cup Grape Nuts. This won't work without the actual stuff, so plan for it. 1 tablespoon brown sugar. No, the white sugar won't work,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1196,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/12\/05\/hope-you-enjoy-it\/","url_meta":{"origin":333,"position":4},"title":"Hope it doesn’t hurt","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"December 5, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Grandpa, you'll live a long time.\u00a0 Me: I hope so. Grandboy: But when you DO die, it won't hurt, will it? Me: I don't know. Grandboy: WHAT?!? YOU DON'T KNOW IF IT'LL HURT???!!? Me: Yep. Depends on how it happens. I might get in a car crash. Or just\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1067,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/03\/17\/extra-helping-of-guilt\/","url_meta":{"origin":333,"position":5},"title":"Extra helping of guilt","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"March 17, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: Ok, I've ordered the food. It'll be here soon. Grandboy: Awww I'm hungry NOW. Make me some Gwumpa Oatmeal...! Me: No, food's on the way. Just wait please. Grandboy: HUNGRY NOW I want food. Oatmeal, pleeeeese gwumpa? Gwumpaaaa..... (this goes on for a while) Me (angrily calculating): Ok. Fine.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/333","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=333"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/333\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":343,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/333\/revisions\/343"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=333"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=333"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=333"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}