When grandpa teaches colors:<\/p>\n
“Which one is the blue one? C’mon you know this; someday your life may depend on it”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When grandpa teaches colors: “Which one is the blue one? C’mon you know this; someday your life may depend…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-300","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-4Q","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1259,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/07\/15\/pretend-your-life-depends-on-it\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":0},"title":"Pretend your life depends on it","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"July 15, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy and I were playing the \"Pretend Your Life Depends On It\" game this weekend... Grandboy (weakly stretching forward): Grandpa. I can't reach that toy car. Can you get it for me? Me: Nope, you get it. Pretend your life depends on it and you're by yourself. ... Grandboy (straining):\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1379,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/08\/10\/i-really-dont-hate-my-life\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":1},"title":"I really don’t hate my life","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 10, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (Sitting on the floor next to a toy aisle): Hrmph. Me: No. Grandboy: But I want a RYAN toyyyyyyy Me: This is not a discussion we're having. C'mon, I've got the toys I'm getting. Let's go. Grandboy: I'm not leaving without a RYAN TOY Me: Then you aren't leaving.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":413,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2015\/05\/03\/too-early-in-the-morning-for-behaviour-analysis\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":2},"title":"Too early in the morning for behaviour analysis","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 3, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"The grandboy's taken the 'why\" question out into psychology realm now. Grandboy: \"GWUMPA gwumpa i'm thirsty gwumpa I'm thirsty. \u00a0May I have some water please?\" Me: \"Ok sure [I hold two cups out] which one would you like, the red cup or the blue cup?\" Grandboy: \"The RED one gwumpa,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1248,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/06\/11\/ears-to-you-ol-chum\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":3},"title":"Ears to you, ol’ chum","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"June 11, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (disembodied voice): HEY GRANDPA you can't find me Me (resisting the temptation to say, \"because I'm not looking\"): Are you under the table? Grandboy (giggling): No Me: Are you... (we go through a series of places where he's not) Grandboy: C'mon, grandpa, you have to actually GUESS. Me: Are\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":229,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2013\/02\/19\/you-know-youre-a-grandpa-when-you-find-this-kind-of-stuff-in-your-coat-pocket\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":4},"title":"You know you’re a grandpa when you find this kind of stuff in your coat pocket","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"February 19, 2013","format":"image","excerpt":"","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?fit=822%2C960&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?fit=822%2C960&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?fit=822%2C960&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?fit=822%2C960&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1482,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/11\/29\/constitutional-republic\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":5},"title":"Constitutional Republic","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"November 29, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (putting a Lego kit together): You know, grandpa, federal gov't that's out of control is actually scary. Me (chuckling): Why do you say that? Grandboy: BECAUSE GRANDPA if one group has all the power they can take your house and things and stuff. Me: Yep. But we have ways\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=300"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":342,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300\/revisions\/342"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=300"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=300"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=300"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}