{"id":229,"date":"2013-02-19T14:46:10","date_gmt":"2013-02-19T20:46:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/?p=229"},"modified":"2015-04-11T15:34:11","modified_gmt":"2015-04-11T21:34:11","slug":"you-know-youre-a-grandpa-when-you-find-this-kind-of-stuff-in-your-coat-pocket","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2013\/02\/19\/you-know-youre-a-grandpa-when-you-find-this-kind-of-stuff-in-your-coat-pocket\/","title":{"rendered":"You know you&#8217;re a grandpa when you find this kind of stuff in your coat pocket"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-231\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?resize=257%2C300\" alt=\"563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n[1]\" width=\"257\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?resize=257%2C300&amp;ssl=1 257w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?w=822&amp;ssl=1 822w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 257px) 100vw, 257px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":231,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"image","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-229","post","type-post","status-publish","format-image","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","post_format-post-format-image"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/563024_10151264362771249_1371499904_n11.jpg?fit=822%2C960&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-3H","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1259,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/07\/15\/pretend-your-life-depends-on-it\/","url_meta":{"origin":229,"position":0},"title":"Pretend your life depends on it","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"July 15, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy and I were playing the \"Pretend Your Life Depends On It\" game this weekend... Grandboy (weakly stretching forward): Grandpa. I can't reach that toy car. Can you get it for me? Me: Nope, you get it. Pretend your life depends on it and you're by yourself. ... Grandboy (straining):\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1396,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/08\/31\/half-way-there-grandpa\/","url_meta":{"origin":229,"position":1},"title":"Half way there, grandpa","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 31, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: I like this song. Grandboy: It's a nice song. Me: I first heard it when your momma was almost your age. Grandboy: Really? She was 8 years old? Me: No, she was like 12, I think. Grandboy (frowning): GRANDPA. That's not even CLOSE. Me: Ah. Just give it a\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1482,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/11\/29\/constitutional-republic\/","url_meta":{"origin":229,"position":2},"title":"Constitutional Republic","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"November 29, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (putting a Lego kit together): You know, grandpa, federal gov't that's out of control is actually scary. Me (chuckling): Why do you say that? Grandboy: BECAUSE GRANDPA if one group has all the power they can take your house and things and stuff. Me: Yep. But we have ways\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1391,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/08\/31\/not-cool-grandpa-its-sick\/","url_meta":{"origin":229,"position":3},"title":"Not cool, grandpa, it&#8217;s sick","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"August 31, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (playing Forza Horizon and looking at cars to play): Oooo grandpa that car looks SICK Me: Ah I hope he feels better soon. Grandboy: Ya.. huh? Me: That car. I hope he gets better from the sickness. Grandboy: O no that means they're COOL. Not like (cough cough) sick.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1426,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/01\/25\/youre-fired\/","url_meta":{"origin":229,"position":4},"title":"You&#8217;re fired","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 25, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: The word, \"fire\" is an odd word. Grandboy: Why is that, grandpa? Me: Well, \"fire\" can burn something, and you can \"fire\" a weapon, and a boss can \"fire\" a person. Same word but they have different meanings. Grandboy (thinking) Grandboy: No, they come from the same thing. A\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1439,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/05\/30\/protect-that-ip\/","url_meta":{"origin":229,"position":5},"title":"Protect that IP","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 30, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"I may have done a very good or a very bad thing. Grandboy was fantasizing about a combo washer & dryer invention. After he finished describing it I told him he needed to write down the idea on paper so other people would know he came up with the idea.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/229","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=229"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/229\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":232,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/229\/revisions\/232"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/231"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=229"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=229"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=229"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}