Grandboy and I were playing the “Pretend Your Life Depends On It” game this weekend…<\/p>\n
Grandboy (weakly stretching forward): Grandpa. I can’t reach that toy car. Can you get it for me?<\/p>\n
Me: Nope, you get it. Pretend your life depends on it and you’re by yourself.<\/p>\n
…<\/p>\n
Grandboy (straining): Grandpa. This is too hard to open. Can you open it for me?<\/p>\n
Me: Nope. You open it. Pretend your life depends on it.<\/p>\n
…<\/p>\n
Grandboy (looking up the stairs): Ugh, grandpa I don’t want to go up there to get my book. Can you go get it for me?<\/p>\n
Me (the look)<\/p>\n
Grandboy: AUGH I KNOW… “Pretend my life depends on it…” (stomp stomp stomp)<\/p>\n
(Coming back down) But when will my life ever depend on me going upstairs to get a book? Or doing any of these things?<\/p>\n
Me: You never know, boy. Figure it out now so you won’t be sad later. You figured out how to do that stuff on your own, didn’t you?<\/p>\n
Grandboy: Yah.<\/p>\n
Me: Learning how to learn is the best thing to learn.<\/p>\n
Grandboy: Grandpa, sometimes you say things that are hard to understand. But that’s ok I still love you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Grandboy and I were playing the “Pretend Your Life Depends On It” game this weekend… Grandboy (weakly stretching forward):…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1259","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-kj","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1196,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/12\/05\/hope-you-enjoy-it\/","url_meta":{"origin":1259,"position":0},"title":"Hope it doesn’t hurt","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"December 5, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Grandpa, you'll live a long time.\u00a0 Me: I hope so. Grandboy: But when you DO die, it won't hurt, will it? Me: I don't know. Grandboy: WHAT?!? YOU DON'T KNOW IF IT'LL HURT???!!? Me: Yep. Depends on how it happens. I might get in a car crash. Or just\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":869,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/01\/21\/pretending-to-play\/","url_meta":{"origin":1259,"position":1},"title":"Pretending to play","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 21, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: [cleaning] Grandboy: Gwumpa i'm driving my car to your shop. You can fix it for me? Me: I can't sorry, I'm cleaning things right now. Grandboy: it's PRETEND Me: [looking over at pretend car] Sorry, I can't play pretend. i need to get this stuff cleaned up before the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1418,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/12\/14\/golly-stones\/","url_meta":{"origin":1259,"position":2},"title":"Golly stones","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"December 14, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Grandpa, how did you get your golly stones? Me: My what? Grandboy: Your golly stones. You know, the ones that made you go to the hospital. Me: O you mean my gall stone. Grandboy: Yah your golly stones. How did you get them? Me: I don't know. I don't\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1420,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2019\/12\/14\/falling-for-you\/","url_meta":{"origin":1259,"position":3},"title":"Falling for you","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"December 14, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Grandpa are you afraid of heights? Me: No, I rather like high places. Grandboy: Wow. You LIKE heights? It doesn't bother you to look down? Me: Nope. Grandboy: So what DOES bother you? Me: Drops. Falling bothers me. There's a big difference between being up high and leaving the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1083,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/05\/05\/mega-stomp-panic\/","url_meta":{"origin":1259,"position":4},"title":"Mega Stomp Panic","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 5, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: Gwumpa that's cool. I wanna try. Me: Ok, wait a minute. Grandboy: Hey that's like a giant robot. I wanna try, Gwumpa Me: Watch what happens when I JUMP Grandboy: AAAUGH that's COOL GWUMPA I WANNA TRY PLEASE --- Thanks Thinkgeek.com. Now he will get exercise for hours, and\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/osi5EKRC0Eg\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1422,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/01\/11\/the-best-grandpa-ever\/","url_meta":{"origin":1259,"position":5},"title":"The best grandpa EVER","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 11, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: \"...boss baby.\" Me: Would you like to be a boss baby? Grandboy: No. Me: Why not? Grandboy: Why do you always ask me things? AAUGH that's like me asking me your deepest darkest secret. Me: Ok. Grandboy: So... What IS your deepest darkest secret? Me: That I have a\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1259","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1259"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1259\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1260,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1259\/revisions\/1260"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1259"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1259"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1259"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}