{"id":1171,"date":"2018-10-13T14:27:55","date_gmt":"2018-10-13T19:27:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/?p=1171"},"modified":"2018-12-07T10:32:38","modified_gmt":"2018-12-07T16:32:38","slug":"the-queen-and-her-bicycle","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/10\/13\/the-queen-and-her-bicycle\/","title":{"rendered":"The Queen and her Bicycle"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>\n\n(music. music on truck speakers)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Grandboy: What&#8217;s that song, grandpa?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Me: O that&#8217;s &#8220;Bicycle&#8221; by Queen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Grandboy: THE QUEEN sings songs?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Me (laughing): No, that&#8217;s the name of the group. It&#8217;s not the Queen singing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Grandboy: Good. She&#8217;s too fancy for that kinda music.\n\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-youtube wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<span class=\"embed-youtube\" style=\"text-align:center; display: block;\"><iframe class=\"youtube-player\" width=\"940\" height=\"529\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/xt0V0_1MS0Q?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en-US&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" style=\"border:0;\" sandbox=\"allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation allow-popups-to-escape-sandbox\"><\/iframe><\/span>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>(music. music on truck speakers) Grandboy: What&#8217;s that song, grandpa? Me: O that&#8217;s &#8220;Bicycle&#8221; by Queen. Grandboy: THE QUEEN&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-iT","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1175,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/10\/19\/the-queens-fat-bottomed-girls\/","url_meta":{"origin":1171,"position":0},"title":"The Queen&#8217;s Fat Bottomed Girls","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"October 19, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"(music. music on truck speakers) Grandboy: Grandpa what's that song called? Me: It's called, \"Fat Bottomed Girls\" by the group, \"Queen\". Grandboy (angry): What?!? Why are they making fun of girls? I don't like it. Me: The 80s was full of stranger things. https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=VMnjF1O4eH0","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/VMnjF1O4eH0\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":948,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/05\/13\/a-couple-of-honkeys\/","url_meta":{"origin":1171,"position":1},"title":"A couple of honkeys","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"May 13, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (honking a bicycle horn repeatedly in the house): GWUMPA STOP (HONK) ME I CAN'T STOP (HONK) HONKING THIS (HONK) HORN!!! Me: You can stop yourself. Grandboy: NO I (HONK) CAN'T YOU HAVE (HONK) TO STOP ME Me: Nope. You have to figure it out on your own. Someday I\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1169,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/10\/13\/six-thousand-evil-clowns\/","url_meta":{"origin":1171,"position":2},"title":"Six thousand evil clowns","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"October 13, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"(music. music on truck speakers) Grandboy: Grandpa who's that singing? Me: It's a group called, \"Journey\". Grandboy: It sounds like evil clowns. Me (laughing): Evil clowns? Grandboy: Six thousand of them. --- One of the most harshest of critiques I've heard to date https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=MxGEVIvSFeY","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/MxGEVIvSFeY\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1173,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/10\/13\/ultraviolent-cars\/","url_meta":{"origin":1171,"position":3},"title":"Ultraviolent Cars","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"October 13, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"(music. music on truck speakers) Grandboy: Grandpa who's that singing that song? Me: It's a group called \"The Cars\". Grandboy: Are the called \"The Cars\" because the sing in cars? Me: No, that's just a name they liked, so they are called \"The Cars\". Grandboy: That's too bad. I like\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/Ki6xHnDAwHw\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1462,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/09\/26\/irish-wristwatch\/","url_meta":{"origin":1171,"position":4},"title":"Irish wristwatch","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"September 26, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: Say the word \"wristwatch\" Grandboy: Wristwatch. Me: Ok, say it a couple of times again Grandboy (repeats it) Me: Ok. Now say the word, \"Irish\" Grandboy: Irish. Me: Ok, say it a couple of times again Grandboy (repeats it) Me: Good. Grandboy: Why did you want me to say\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1422,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/01\/11\/the-best-grandpa-ever\/","url_meta":{"origin":1171,"position":5},"title":"The best grandpa EVER","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 11, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: \"...boss baby.\" Me: Would you like to be a boss baby? Grandboy: No. Me: Why not? Grandboy: Why do you always ask me things? AAUGH that's like me asking me your deepest darkest secret. Me: Ok. Grandboy: So... What IS your deepest darkest secret? Me: That I have a\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1171","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1171"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1171\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1201,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1171\/revisions\/1201"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1171"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1171"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1171"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}