\n\nGrandboy: …and her dad, he got stung by a WHOLE LOTTA yellow jackets and died. I don’t know if she said he was allergic but it was A LOT.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Me: O no. I’m sorry he died.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Grandboy: Yah, and.. hey, wait. Do you REALLY MEAN that or are you like, (in a mocking, singsong voice) “Oh nooo, I’m SO SORRY…”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Me: No really, that’s a sad thing for her family to go through. Think about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Grandboy: I KNOW. That’s why I wanted to know you knew that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
—<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Oi, he’s getting that defensive armor already. I’d forgotten how brutal second grade can be!\n\n<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Grandboy: …and her dad, he got stung by a WHOLE LOTTA yellow jackets and died. I don’t know if…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1153","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p62ahB-iB","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":869,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/01\/21\/pretending-to-play\/","url_meta":{"origin":1153,"position":0},"title":"Pretending to play","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 21, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: [cleaning] Grandboy: Gwumpa i'm driving my car to your shop. You can fix it for me? Me: I can't sorry, I'm cleaning things right now. Grandboy: it's PRETEND Me: [looking over at pretend car] Sorry, I can't play pretend. i need to get this stuff cleaned up before the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":572,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2015\/07\/24\/lets-catch-a-case-of-the-happies\/","url_meta":{"origin":1153,"position":1},"title":"Let’s catch a case of the Happies","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"July 24, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (sad): Why you no play game with me? Me: Sorry, i don't want to play a game today. Grandboy: Why? Me: I'm in a bad mood. I'll play a little later. Grandboy (crosses arms, frowns): Hmph. I in a bad mood, too. Me: Why are you in a bad\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/2855812597_5005c93350_b1.jpg?fit=1024%2C582&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/2855812597_5005c93350_b1.jpg?fit=1024%2C582&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/2855812597_5005c93350_b1.jpg?fit=1024%2C582&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/2855812597_5005c93350_b1.jpg?fit=1024%2C582&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1065,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2018\/03\/06\/gwumpa-is-always-shouting\/","url_meta":{"origin":1153,"position":2},"title":"Gwumpa is always shouting","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"March 6, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: O hey please stop touching the walls. I just had them painted. Grandboy: Ok Gwumpa. Me: Ok stop touching the walls. Your hands are greasy and I'm trying to keep the new paint clean. Grandboy: Ok Gwumpa, sorry. Me: No, really, STOP TOUCHING THE WALLS when you walk past\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":636,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2015\/10\/11\/balance-of-power\/","url_meta":{"origin":1153,"position":3},"title":"Balance of power","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"October 11, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy: I sorry I drew on things. I can have my markers back now? I neeeeed to color my pictures. Me: I don't know where your markers went. That's between you and your momma. Mamasan: Use your crayons. Grandboy: Gwumpa, I can have my legos now? I pick them up\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1462,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2020\/09\/26\/irish-wristwatch\/","url_meta":{"origin":1153,"position":4},"title":"Irish wristwatch","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"September 26, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Me: Say the word \"wristwatch\" Grandboy: Wristwatch. Me: Ok, say it a couple of times again Grandboy (repeats it) Me: Ok. Now say the word, \"Irish\" Grandboy: Irish. Me: Ok, say it a couple of times again Grandboy (repeats it) Me: Good. Grandboy: Why did you want me to say\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":876,"url":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/2017\/01\/07\/of-course-i-am\/","url_meta":{"origin":1153,"position":5},"title":"Of course I am","author":"Gwumpa Stories","date":"January 7, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Grandboy (playing battle Minecraft): Augh I died Me: Hey but you're getting better! Grandboy: Of course I am --- Humility is his best trait","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1153","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1153"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1153\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1154,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1153\/revisions\/1154"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1153"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1153"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.monkeyinfinitum.com\/gwumpastories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1153"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}